When I was a kid, my mom and her best friend worked at Valente’s for years. It’s where my mom met my brother’s father, a local musician. Because of my mother’s ‘fondness’ for musicians, it’s where I learned to truly appreciate live music and the talented Denver music scene. Dave Kimball, Ronnie Berg, Jolly Demus, Lannie Garrett–I’m thinking of you!

At 14, Valente’s was my first job. I was paid in cash (Senior was willing to try me out) until I was 15 and legal. It’s how I saved for my first cheerleading uniform, as an 8th grader at Wheat Ridge Junior High. My mom’s best friend bought my uniform, and I gave her my earnings every week until I paid her back.

When it was slow on the weekends I would have to dust and clean every celebrity picture in both dining rooms, as well as the upstairs lounge. If you’ve been to Valente’s you know just how many pictures that was! This is where I learned that:

• Hard work pays off.
• Honesty and integrity will earn you respect.
• Being kind and having a good attitude will get you a long, long way (especially when you come to the table, pardon the pun, with little to no experience).

Senior was tough–but fair. Junior was a little less tough, but just as fair. I never worked for Marc, across the street. But I spent many an hour at Marc’s, hanging out with adults who did. Marc’s is where I used to daydream about fancy, romantic restaurants. Ah, the 80s!

Valente’s was the best Italian restaurant, ever. In 30+ years I’ve never found a better plate of homemade spaghetti. And the ravioli! And the homemade cannoli! When Madeline (the hostess with the mostest) couldn’t find me, she would simply look in the cooler–inevitably I’d be sneaking in there, spooning out and eating cannoli mix.

Speaking of Madeline, she was the coolest old cat lady ever. With her horn-rimmed glasses, her sharp tongue, and her quick wit, she taught me that age is just a number. She went to Vegas every year and loved Elvis, her cats, and her son (in that order, I think). Sometimes on weekend days, when it was just us and two waitstaff, she’d turn off the cheesy Italian music and turn on the King. And at the end of each of my weekend shifts, she always gave me three Andes mints, which, to this day are still my favorite.

Sometimes when it was slow, Madeline and I would order an old-fashioned pizza, then ‘call back’ a little later and cancel. Once it was in the oven, it had to be finished. We could order a regular pizza for our shift meal, but not the old-fashioned. This was our way of treating ourself to that delicious pie once in awhile. (Did I mention how cool Madeline was?)

Valente’s is also where my musical life was changed forever. Scott Valente worked the take-out window (he was a great nephew, or grandson, or great something, to Senior). He was several years older, and always patient. Even to annoying young teenage girls. Scott introduced me to Oingo Boingo and INXS, and I can never thank him enough. Sure, Madonna was my idol, but to learn there was more out there than sugary pop music? Priceless!

And don’t forget about the football! It wasn’t unusual to have Broncos players stopping in for a meal or a drink in the upstairs lounge. For my birthday one year, I was even treated to a Valente’s dinner with Rich Karlis, who I had terrible crush on. I still think he’s the cutest Bronco ever.

Valente’s was my life in the mid-80s. I knew Junior the best of the ‘adult’ Valente’s, but I did know, and I do remember, Senior. Without his restaurant, I’d probably be listening to Drake (OMG Hotline Bling is the worst song ever), eating what I thought was authentic Italian food at Macaroni Grill, and wouldn’t understand the value of hard work, generosity, and a good attitude.

I often have dreams about working at Valente’s. I remember each dining room, the old framed newspapers (where I learned the story of John Dillinger), the celebrity headshots, the server’s area that took up the back wall, and the in-and-out doors. I remember the placement of every table, and every booth. I remember the vintage, copper espresso machine in the upstairs lounge, and I remember hanging out by the service bar, waiting for Nancy to get off so she could take me home. I remember it all.

And for all of this, I thank you Senior. I hope the El Camino is getting even more miles now. Rest in Peace.

Coincidence? I think not.

So MM and I met for lunch. It was great seeing him and the hour flew by. During that time we did a lot of catching up, and our conversation inevitably led to ST. There were a few of us that had been trying to reconnect with her, but up to this time no one knew what had happened to her. At lunch he shocked me by telling me that only a few days earlier she walked into his best friend’s work (who also was a super-dear friend of mine), totally out of the blue. Not only that but ST got MM’s number and had called him, while he was driving to meet me for lunch! Coincidence? I don’t believe in coincidence.

I didn’t want to put MM in an uncomfortable position by asking for ST’s number so I asked him if he would give her my number when they met next week. He said of course he would, and we had to wrap up lunch so I could go back to work. Of course the first few days I couldn’t check my phone fast enough when it rang to see who was calling, or to see if I hand any missed calls when I was away. After a few weeks, however, I stopped waiting for ST to call. While MM had given ST my number, she obviously didn’t want to use it. This made me sad, but I understood. Afterall, we’re talking over 10 years with not so much as a single word. And as I’ve mentioned. I wasn’t always the greatest friend.

Fast forward five months. I’m going about my everyday business when I get a text message from MM asking me for my email address. I quickly sent it to him, but didn’t dare hope he was asking on behalf of someone else. Why set myself up for that again? So it came as a complete shock when only a day or so later, I get an email from ST stating that she heard I wanted to get in touch with her, and asking me how I was doing. I guess patience really is a virtue!

Since then we’ve passed a few emails back and forth. They’re tentative and kind of awkward which is, of course, understandable. ST asked right away if I was trying to reconnect, or if I was just curious about what had happened to her. I felt it was a test question and I didn’t have the right answer. Which answer did she want? Did she want to reconnect? I know she was probably just reaching out to satisfy her curiosity–what happened to that selfish girl? Did she end up in prison? Divorced for a second time? A street walker? 😆 I’m pretty sure that’s all she wanted and then she’d be on her way again. I’m trying to make sure that doesn’t happen. I do want to reconnect. I know we’ll never be as close as we were all of those years ago, but ST was the most important person in my life for many years and I’m still selfish enough to want to hold on to that.

I’m hoping there will be a part 3 to this little story. There have been several more emails since I wrote this, and with each email we both seem to be loosening up a bit. Stay tuned.

I look back with regret on the friendships I have lost; some of them were substantial and one was the most substantial of all. I’ve tried to move forward as a better person, and to some extent I’ve succeeded. I’m not perfect and I have many lessons to learn before I’m done. but losing some of the most important people in my life made me realize that living selfish and in-the-moment is not as fulfilling as living selfless and for the present (and the future).

It’s been over 10 years since I’ve spoken with my best friend from those days. (She’s in the pic of me above, but I cropped her out–I would never post someone’s pic without consent.) She’d had enough of me during my divorce from my first husband (that’s a story for a different post). I guess she got tired of my behavior, and I can’t say that I blame her. Of course, there’s a part of me that thinks if you are truly a friend you stick it out, for better or for worse. I’d like to say that I would have, but who knows. I was a bit of a selfish bitch 15 years ago and maybe I’d have had enough of me as well.

15 years later, I still think of her. Not every day, but often enough that she’s usually very present in my mind. I dream about her a lot too, which is kind of odd (and all you perverts out there can sod off–they’re not those kinds of dreams 😆 ). Since moving to FL four years ago I’ve often toyed with the idea of trying to get in touch with her. I’ve even gone so far as Googling her and attempting to find her on Facebook and other networking sites. All to no avail.

Then, one sunny September day I received a Facebook message from another old, dear friend that I thought I had lost long ago (we have reconnected via Facebook) asking if I wanted to get together when I was visiting Denver. I was thrilled, and we set a date for lunch. Little did I know how much that lunch would turn out to mean to me.

I’m going to leave you in suspense here. I didn’t realize how long this post had become. Look for part 2 in the next couple of days.

This is the Four Things tag/meme/crap:

Four names that people call you (I’ve put mine in order):

1. Mommy
2. WebBetty
3. Mel
4. Melissa

Four jobs I have had in my life:

1. Mom
2. Instructional Designer
3. Hooters Girl
4. Bartender

Four movies I’ve watched more than once:

1. Pretty Woman
2. White Christmas
3. Pretty In Pink
4. Star Wars

Four places I have lived:

1. Denver, CO
2. Lakewood, CO
3. Wheatridge, CO
3. Apopka, FL

Four places I have traveled:

1. Cozumel, Mexico
2. Puerto Vallerto, Mexico
3. Cancun, Mexico
4. San Diego, CA

Four People who e-mail me:

1. My client Dave
2. My eCollege coworkers
3. Facebook
4. Immigrants who will give me money to deposit their long-lost family members earnings

Four of my favorite Foods:

1. Pasta
2. Green Chili
3. Strawberries
4. soup

Four places I’d rather be right now:

1. on a beach
2. Vegas
3. on a beach
4. on a beach

Four things I’m looking forward to this year:

1. My 10-year anniversary (in Vegas 😛 )
2. My sons becoming even more awesome.
3. More wonderfulness for my friends and family.
4. A better economy.

Four TV shows that I watch:

I have to list only 4? bummer.

1. Dexter
2. CSI (all of them)
3. Saving Grace
4. Law & Order (all of them)

Ha ha! That’s actually 9 shows, so there!

So there you have it. More crap about me you probably didn’t want to know!

This post was generously brought to you by luggage. If you want to go to Vegas in June with us, you’ll need some. 🙂

I’m not one to ever miss a party, so here I am, adding my 25 things to the millions of other useless things other people have said about themselves.

25 random things about me

1. Polar bears are my favorite animal, which is too bad since they’re going to be extinct soon.
2. There are three movies that will always make me cry–no matter how many times I’ve seen them: “Juno,” “Pay it Forward,” and “Hope Floats.” ((Yes, there are probably more than three. If you think of others, let me know.))
3. Speaking of crying, this commercial always makes me cry–no matter how many times I’ve seen it:
   
   
   
   I’m crying right now, dammit!
4. Even though Zachary insists it should be pink since I’m a girl, my favorite color is really red.
5. I’ve been behind the stage (and underground) at Red Rocks. It was during a Harry Connick Jr. concert ((Yes, I got to meet him.))
6. At Red Rocks I’ve also seen Sting, John Mellencamp, Natalie Merchant, Tom Petty, Buddy Guy, Jonny Lang and Reggae on the Rocks.
7. I’ve had four best friends in my life. One I’ve just reconnected with, two I don’t talk to nearly as often as I would like to, and one I haven’t spoken to in over a decade. 🙁

8. I hate clowns. I have always hated clowns. Clowns are evil.
9. One of the best presents I ever received was one I was never able to use: an enlarger for a darkroom that we were never able to get built.
10. I hate Taco Bell. I think their food is possibly the worst on the planet. ((Okay, maybe it’s second behind Casa Bonita but only people from Colorado will know what Casa Bonita is.))
11. This is the second time I’ve been married. I didn’t try to be a very good wife to my first husband–I’m trying to be a good one to Chris. ((My first marriage was for 2 years. Chris and I are celebrating our 10th anniversary in June. 🙂 ))
12. I’m really bad at Guitar Hero, so I refuse to play.
13. I’ve only lived in two places my entire life: Colorado for 34 years, and Florida the past 3 years.
14. While I lived in Colorado my entire life I have never skied. Ever.
15. I’ve only been out of the country three times in my life. And all three trips were to Mexico.
16. Before I die I want to see Italy, Paris, and Africa.
17. I don’t like going to the movies–most movies aren’t worth the cost of admission. I’d much rather watch movies at home in my PJs with a glass of wine and the ability to pause it when I have to pee.
18. I love to throw darts, and was captain of a dart team in Denver until I got pregnant. Damn kids! 😉
19. I really miss Denver. If we could manage it, I think we’d move back.
20. I hate olives. ALL olives. Even Olive Oyl.

    

21. My dream car (Saab convertible) turned out to be not-so-dreamy. ((And I still hate to love it.))
22. I have seen John Elway drunk on a bar stage singing YMCA. Arm gestures and all.
23. I still love roller skating and go every Sunday I can, for adult night.
24. I didn’t appreciate Led Zeppelin until I was in my late 20s. Thank you Sara, wherever you are!
25. I actually enjoyed waiting tables ((I’m really good at it.))  My two favorite places to work were The Piper Inn and The Brewery Bar.

And there you have it. You can all stop tagging me now!

This post was generously brought to you by promotional pens. Here’s another random fact: I love pens!

Ah, the meme. Bloggers love them (Okay, many bloggers love memes, other bloggers abhor them and avoid them like the plague.) For personal blogs, a meme is great for a variety of reasons.

• It’s guaranteed original content–and if it’s not, I’m sure the police are looking for you, what with all the stalker laws we have these days.
• Memes are self-important. Since we all know bloggers really just blog to “hear” themselves talk, memes give us an opportunity to wax poetic about ourselves.
• Not only is a meme original content, it’s content. Having blogger’s block? Post a meme!
• Even though we generally blog for ourselves, we want people to read. And face it, we’re voyeurs at heart. We want to know all those crazy things about you!

Personally, I do like memes. I enjoy reading them, and I enjoy doing them. Especially ones I haven’t seen before, like…

5 things I own

Each question is pretty self explanatory.

Name a book you own that you don’t think any of your friends own.

Hmm, I have quite a few options here. I could go with something geeky and technical, but a lot of my friends are geeky and technical so that wouldn’t be a challenge. I could list a cheesy romance, but that would give away my cheesy, romantic side. I could also totally cheat and list one of Zachary or Jonah’s books. 😛 But I’m not a cheater. So, a book I own that I don’t think any of my friends own is “Causewired: Plugging In, Getting Involved, Changing the Word“. I received it in the mail last month as a surprise gift for participating in Blog Action Day 08. ((Uh-oh, this means that some of my eFriends may have this book.))

Name a movie you own that you don’t think any of your friends own.

I can say, without a doubt, a movie I own that none of my friends own is “Penny Serenade“. Chris bought it for me years ago, knowing that Cary Grant is one of my all-time favorite actors. This is not one of his well-known movies, but it is one of his best. It’s a moving story about life and love, and comes from an era when movies had an actual plot and actors gave everything they had to every role. If you have a chance, check it out.

Name a CD you own that you don’t think any of your friends own.

This one is a little tricky. Who owns CDs anymore? So, I’ll change the “rules” a little. This can be a CD and/or a full album on MP3. 🙂 I also think this will be a super easy one to answer since 1) I have a very extensive music collection due to my love of music, and 2) with the availability of music from everywhere, online, it’s not difficult to pick up an exotic album that no one else around you has. So now I just have to pick the one that makes me sound the coolest!

I’m going to say that an album I own that I don’t think any of my friends own is “Savage Night” by The Blue Hawaiians. They are a totally cool surf-rock band from LA. They have a hip, smooth, cool, lazy, über sound and I completely dig ’em! Being the internet diva I am, I found them online years ago. I love the internet!

Name a place that you have visited that you don’t think any of your friends have visited.

This one is a toughie for me since I’m not really well-traveled. I would guess that the majority of the places I’ve been to, someone I know has been there too. There are a few places, though. One of them that I’m sure none of my friends has visited is backstage at the Auditorium Theatre in Chicago. I had the pleasure of seeing opening night of Miss Saigon there, and was escorted backstage after the show where I had my picture taken with the helicopter. Afterwards, I attended the opening night party. What a blast–theater people really do know how to party!

Name a piece of technology or any sort of tool you own that you don’t think any of your friends own.

I’m going to have to invoke the “what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is mine” rule on this one. Since I’m such a techno-geek, I have a lot of techno-geek friends. This means they probably have the same tools and gadgets I do. Because of that, I’m going to say that one piece of technology that I own we own is Chris’ U2 edition, black and red iPod with the band’s signatures engraved in the back. I think I can claim it here, since I bought it for him a few years back for Father’s Day.

This iPod is old school. No color screen, no graphics. Straight-up gray screen, text with the old click wheel and only a 20G hard drive. How sweet is that? 😉

And there it is–my latest meme. I’ve told you five things I own. Now you tell me. What is one of the five things above that you own?

This post was generously brought to you by PDAs. I wonder if the iPhone considered a PDA…

While plurking the other day, I was asked what my favorite move and movie genre were. I always hate questions like this. Is it really possible to pick one favorite movie? One favorite song? One favorite book? That would be like asking me to pick which of my sons I like better—it depends on my mood. 😛

I suppose there are people who can say definitively “__________ is my favorite move.” I, alas, am not one of these people. If you’re going to strand me on a desert island with only one movie, don’t even bother. Just weigh me down, drop me in the ocean, and be done with it.

To determine what my favorite movies are, I had to decide what “favorite movie” really means. I decided it was pretty simple. To me a favorite movie is one I could watch over, and over, and over again. I have seen the movies on my list at least 3 or 4 times. ((Okay, I’ve seen most of these upwards of 15+ times. What’s it to you?))

I’ve placed my movies in order by release date. I needed some kind of order—alphabetical order is too boring.

NOTE: this post was updated on 12/15/09. Two fantastic movies that I overlooked were added.

(1951) People Will Talk

(1954) White Christmas

(1955) To Catch a Thief

(1959) North By Northwest

(1974) Young Frankenstein

(1978) Foul Play

(1983) Trading Places

(1984) Sixteen Candles

(1986) Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

(1987) The Princess Bride

(1989) Parenthood

(1990) Pretty Woman

(1994) Pulp Fiction

(1995) French Kiss

(1997) L.A. Confidential

(1998) Hope Floats

(1998) There’s Something About Mary

(1999) Notting Hill

(2000) Gladiator

(2001) A Knight’s Tale

(2006) Casino Royale

(2007) Juno

(2008) Iron Man

What an eclectic list! Of course, being a chic, there are quite a few romantic comedies. Cary Grant also appears several times (he was just so cool). I know more movies will occur to me, but right now, these are the top of the fold.

Are you surprised by any of these? What are some movies that would make your list?

I got a free life insurance quote to support this post. 🙂

Well, kind of. 😉 Stefanie at Focus Organic actually tagged 10 things, but since that’s a blog for shredding reviewing websites, I decided to “accept” the tag here, where it’s more appropriate. I hope you don’t mind, Stefanie!

So, here are seven facts about myself:

1. My name is not Betty. Web-Betty was born 13 years ago as a spin-off of the term ‘shred Betty’ which, in snowboard speak, refers to hot female snowboarders.
2. I once jumped on stage at a Chris Isaak concert. Luckily, he’s so cool he not only let me stay and dance, he invited a few other girls up there too.
3. I could listen to 70s pop music until I die. Ambrosia, 10CC, Bread—the hokier, the better.
4. I believe that if you intentionally harm a child, there is nothing you could be subjected to that would be too awful or painful.
5. I also believe Gandi’s saying “Be the change you want to see in the world.” I try to follow those words and while I may often fail, I keep trying.
6. I am married to the best guy in the world, whom I often take for granted.
7. It only has to reach 65 before I will put the top down on the car. I may have to run the heater at the same time, but the top will go down!

Now you have seven more useless facts about me. As with all tags, here are the bloggers I’m bugging today:

• From Where I Sit
• Modern Mami
• Miss Attitude
• My Signs of Life
• Not Buying It
• Trapped in the Office
• Tele Twenties

Now I’m off to tell them they’ve been tagged! If you’re not on the list, feel free to join in fun. Give me a fun fact about yourself below: