I swear I just did this. Ah well, as they say, Carpe Flies, no. Seize the fish. No, Time Flies—That’s the one! Speaking of Carpe Diem I have to give a great big SHOUT OUT to sweet Citizen Janey! She completed this: The Women’s Half Marathon. And let me tell you, the time she completed it in, well it would have taken me a hell of a lot longer. Who am I kidding? I wouldn’t have lasted 10 minutes! YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION JANEY!

But enough about her. Let’s talk about my week.

I think I broke my toe a few weeks ago. Here’s a tip: don’t leave a case of 32-count diet soda sitting in an unexpected place in your kitchen, and then go wandering around for a snack after a few pints after the kids have gone to bed. I also don’t recommend re-banging it on the bunk beds a week later. Damn boys need to start changing their own sheets!

I don’t actually know for certain if it’s broken, but since the family has been to see Aunt Ivonne three times in as many weeks, I figure I’d give her a break. I do know for certain that being off the weight loss drugs has really sucked. Yes, I’ve gained a little weight back. I’m not up to where I was at my ‘peak’ but I’m up enough to be uncomfortable in my clothes. Could someone out there please tell me how to fit in 50 hours of work, domestic slavery duties, making sure two boys are fed, clothed, bathed and put to bed AND fit in an hour a day of Wii Fit??? I know the Miller Lite’s not helping (my waistline anyway, but I have two boys who are still breathing), but I’m sure if I could counteract it with some exercise I’d be ahead of the game (or at least able to keep up). If there is anyone out there who knows the secret, I beg of you, tell me what it it!!

Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is knowing not to put a tomato in fruit salad.

I do know that stress is contributing to it a little bit. I’m a stress-dinner-eater. By the time dinner rolls around I’m so ready for my day to be almost over and I’m ready to relax that I shovel my dinner in. I know I should monitor my portions, not take seconds, put my fork down between bites, yadda yadda yadda. Unfortunately, there is a difference between knowledge and wisdom. ((Sometimes I know the difference between knowledge and wisdom and sometimes I ignore it!))

As I’m coming back to this, I just finished dinner. Yep, there was some stress eating involved. *sigh* Maybe tomorrow. For tonight I’m going to put the boys to bed and get myself a glass of wine. Zachary is on vacation, so by extension, so am I. It’s just easier to take the week off when he’s home for five days. We went to a wrap place for lunch while waiting for my car ((My car is another blog: if you really want to read about it check out at The Saab Blaag.)) and the girl behind the counter, while looking pointedly at me, asked Zachary if he was on a break. No, silly girl. I keep him home to do the domestic chores. Who else would do all of our laundry? But thanks for asking. Really, it is your business. ((Okay, Zachary only has to do all of the domestic chores when he’s home on break, like this week for Thanksgiving. 😉 ))

Oh yes, I was talking about wine. The boys are now in bed so it’s time. I bought my bottle of wine at Winn-Dixie tonight and they actually had me remove my ID from its holder and they scanned it. WTF!? I don’t like the idea of the grocery store scanning my ID every time I buy a bottle of wine or some Miller Lite. And don’t give me that BS about it reading my age. If the cashier can’t READ my age, they shouldn’t be in a position to determine if I’m old enough to purchase a bottle of wine. Big Brother is watching, from Winn Dixie.

I have no segue here, but I have to say I’m trying to learn more and get the most out of my MacBook Pro. Since I’ve started reading Mac|Life and Macworld, I’ve realized I have not even scratched the surface with all the cool shit this computer can do. I’ve installed some great apps (most of ’em free), I’ve made changes to make the most of my doc, spaces and exposé, and I’m seriously enjoying my upgrade to Snow Leopard. Of course Snow Leopard would totally rock if my company’s exchange server was up-to-date so I could take advantage of SL’s newly integrated exchange support, but I guess a girl can’t have it all.

So that’s the past week of randomness. Would you like some more? Be sure to check out The UnMom. She’s as cool as me, lol!

Since I hadn’t been grocery shopping in awhile, we ordered pizza from Pizza Hut the other night. I actually ordered our dinner online. ((God I love the internet!)) I was filling out the form and signing up for the first time ((No, I don’t make it a habit of ordering pizza for dinner.)) when I noticed the “Don’t know your zip code?” option. I may not be a brain surgeon, but really? Don’t know your zip code? How is that really possible?

I did make dinner tonight. Spaghetti. A family favorite and easy to make. All the moms reading this know exactly what I’m talking about. Now it’s nice and peaceful, with the boys in bed and Chris out playing poker. I’m enjoying a nice glass (or 3) of wine and watching what is becoming my new favorite show on TV. The Good Wife. If you haven’t watched this show you are truly missing out. This is one of the best new dramas on the tube. I didn’t really like Julianna Margulies in ER—I thought she was a stuck-up whiny bitch. But she’s fantastic in this. The stories are interesting and the cases are fresh. Sorry, I stopped to watch. You really should be watching too.

So I’m composing this blog masterpiece, not in WordPress, but in WriteRoom. I will copy and paste all of this sacred text into WP when I’m finished, but I love that WR completely covers my screen and leaves me with nothing except a green blinking curser. A cursor just waiting to be moved by my amazing prose.

Speaking of WordPress, I’m really enjoying 2.8. I know, I’m late to the party again, but I only upgraded a few months ago. Sometimes I avoid change. Anyway, while composing my last post in WP I noticed the Quick Post option. Quick post, really? How does that work exactly? I couldn’t compose a quick post if you gave me a timer, 20 minutes all to myself, and a pre-written script. Something tells me I will not ever be using the WP quick post.

But while we’re discussing WP, I do LOVE the WP app for my iPhone. I’ve already composed three drafts. Maybe one of them will see the light of day.

I’m so happy that I’ve kept a random list the past week. I actually have more randomness than I think is wise to put in one post. But that’s the beauty of random. I can save it for next week. I will leave you with one last random thing. I was really sad to hear about the death of Ken Ober. The 80’s MTV show Remote Control was one of my favorites. And while it was the birth of all things I loathe about MTV now (like no music television), I loved the game and watching the then- young Colin Quinn, Adam Sandler and Denis Leary. RIP Ken Ober. RIP.

Alas, dear readers. It has been too long. I apologize for the absence. Life, believe it or not, takes precedence over blogging. 😉

But it’s a nice Tuesday evening. The boys are in bed. Chris is off playing poker (and hopefully winning–baby needs a new pair of shoes!). So I’m taking a little time for some Random Tuesday Thoughts!

We watched Kung Fu Hustle over the weekend. It was fabulous and you should definitely check it out. ((Unless crap like Twilight is more your thing. In that case, don’t bother. You wouldn’t understand Kung Fu Hustle.)) I loved Landlady and wish I could kick ass like that in my housecoat and curlers.

While we’re on the topic of entertainment, I’m seriously pissed at my DVR. It keeps messing up all of my programs. I’m missing things I want to see. The Brighthouse box is a piece of crap.

And segue to American Idol. since I had to reset my DVR I forgot to set AI up to record. For the past three weeks. So I’ve missed all the Adam glory. Poop.

I guess this is turning out to be the all-entertainment version of Random Tuesday Thoughts.

So, who knew a bunch of geriatrics could sound so good. The Fleetwood Mac concert last night was awesome! Stevie Nicks sounded amazing and Mick Fleetwood looked like he was having the time of his life. Thanks Nicole, for going with me!

I can’t wait for the U2 concert in October. We’re taking Zachary ((We haven’t told him yet–we’re giving him his ticket on his 6th birthday.)) I’ve seen them twice–both shows were amazing. I really like the new album, even though some people are slamming it. Hey, not every album can be The Joshua Tree.

And on an I’m-my-own-entertainment note (for this entertainment post), I’m now off to check out Westgate Reservations–they have a Vegas resort (Westgate Flamingo Bay). Let’s see what deals they have for hubby and me. Vegas in June baby! 🙂

I can be as random as the next person, right? What’s funny is that I always have these random ramblings while I’m driving Jonah to school, or on the way to the store, or while I’m reading “Guess How Much I Love You” for the gazillionth time–but I don’t ever seem to have them when I can actually write them down! Let’s see what I can come up with today.

I don’t understand dogs–I am definitely NOT the dog whisperer. Some dog behaviors, however, are more perplexing than others. For instance, I don’t get why a dog who will lick his own balls after taking a dump and actively seek out the cat’s vomit for a midday snack, will approach his food bowl with caution and disdain at feeding time. Seriously, what is up with that?

Speaking of things I don’t get, high on that list is Tom Cruise. I seriously don’t get his popularity. First of all, he’s short! Meaning he has “little man’s disease”–you know it, you’ve seen it! Second, he doesn’t act. He just plays himself wearing different costumes. Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg ((Valkyrie)) was Ethan Hunt ((Mission Impossible)) in Nazi garb. Ethan Hunt was Jerry Maguire ((Jerry Maguire, duh!)) with cool gadgets. Jerry Maguire was Maverick ((If you need the title of this movie, you are too young to read this blog.)) with less interesting friends. Maverick was Joel Goodsen ((Risky Business)) in a flight suit. And Joel was just Tom Cruise in his underwear. Nope, I just don’t get it.

Going with no segue at all, while I know it’s not nice to make fun of others, when I see ads for adult disposable diapers I just have to chuckle. I’m sure karma will get the last laugh ((Pun intended, in case you were wondering.)) and I’ll be wearing these in 30 years. Hell, I already have to clench my cooter when I laugh (stupid childbirth!).

And on a childbirth note (kind of), spring really must be on its way, if the number of itty, bitty, baby lizards I’ve seen around are any indication. They are so dang cute–except when they appear on my carpet as regurgitated cat food. Ugh.

Yep, spring. I’m seeing mud dauber wasps in the afternoon heat. I really hate those things. Time to go out and try and find their stupid nests. They especially like small, one-way openings so they build their nests in our sliding glass door tracks. ((Of course we don’t open our windows in the summer. Are you crazy?))

Well, I think this has been pretty random. Your turn. Hit me with your randomness! Leave your random comments below. 😛

I’m a little late to the party, but dammit, it’s still Tuesday here and I’ve been busy with shit that actually pays me.

This is my first venture into the Un-Mom’s Random Tuesday post, but I figured I have so much random stuff to say, this meme has my name all over it. Add a few glasses of Red, and I’m ready to go. 🙂

Welcome to “Random Tuesday Thoughts”! (Note: for my sensitive readers, some foul language may follow, as I’m feeling a little irritable right now. Read on at your own discrection 😛 )

Let the ranting begin!

I’m really ready for this fucking sinus infection to GO AWAY!. It’s been almost three weeks and I’m still more plugged up than a bathtub drain full of skanky hair. I’m wondering if the drugs aren’t working this time. Antibiotics for the virus, steroids for the asthma, inhaler for the asthma, and a lot of kleenex. Maybe I need to see a ENT specialist?

Can someone tell me what is up with the new Pepsi logo? I think it sucks. Honestly, Jonah and Zachary have created better work. Ugh!

Speaking of Zachary, the Goose quote of the week is “I have room in my heart for 162 people.” Wow, he’s a lot more generous than I am.

And now on to lawn guys. I have two things to say:

1. To the lawn guys who stole my husband’s power tools out of our garage, Karma is a bitch. I hope that when you use the drill, you drill into something electrical and your house explodes (with no one in it, of course). And I hope that when you use the sawzall, you come perilously close to losing an extremity. You don’t have to actually lose something, but I hope you come REALLY close.
2. Leaf blowers have to be the biggest waste of energy–both people and gas. Not a day goes by that I don’t seem some idiot wandering around the neighborhood with one of those stupid things strapped to their back. Walking back and forth, swinging his blower. I want to run them down with my car.

And one last note. While I find the line “Sent from my iPhone” incredibly pretentious, I can’t seem to be compelled to change and/or remove it when I email from my beloved phone.

Now it’s your turn. Give me some of your randomness!